Summer is in full swing, but Poppy is watching it from a chair thanks to a “should probably have given up cheerleading before my mid-30s” back problem. But that doesn’t mean I’m not still busy being amused by a few new random observations.
First, I know the whole world has opinions about social media and Facebook, and I’m not crazy enough to stick my toe in that quicksand, but I think it’s really time to stop flashing the “Get COVID information here” message on every third post in my Fakebook feed. It’s inconceivable to me that they still think there’s anyone left on the planet who will see that and say, “Oh goodness, is something going on in healthcare? Someone turn on the news! Hey, while you’re at it, maybe check to see if we had the election yet.”
Of course I still don’t like customer service phones; particularly the artificial intelligence operators. It’s particularly insulting when they play the fake typing noise to reassure (and totally convince) me that, no, it’s not a robot at all, but a real live human pounding 120 wpm on what sounds like a 1977 Corona typewriter. It’s a bit like Samurai movies dubbed in English… I say three words and “human” Karen clacks about 400 characters. Perhaps there was a focus group in a board room somewhere that determined people are less likely to hang up if there’s no silence.
And can someone please tell me why I have to prove my identity when I’m trying to pay a bill on the phone? Are there terror cells and scammers trying to pay strangers’ bills across the nation? I’m okay with that, really. If someone is willing to do that, you have my permission to let them. I feel the same about the bank that won’t let me deposit money into my mom’s account. Shame on me for trying to send her money in a convenient and timely manner.
In other questionably stupid things, I actually got a letter from the IRS telling me that I would be getting a letter from the IRS that would explain the money I’m going to get from the IRS in a few months. Granted, it’s always a little suspicious to get money from them—without explanation—so you then have to worry about when they’re going to want it back, but couldn’t they just have included a note with the check? Glad to see my government is spending my tax money on redundancy and killing trees.
On the more personal side, you know you’re getting older when you’re filling out an Internet profile form on your device and you get to your year of birth, you have to spin that wheel like you’re on “The Price is Right”. I generally have to take that second spin too. Delightful.
Speaking of “old”, I’ve decided that it must not be so bad to go to prison. Bill Cosby got rid of his cane and is apparently no longer blind since getting out a few weeks ago. Miraculous! Given my current medical bills, the next 24 months might actually be cheaper that way.
Meanwhile, back to Summer life and recliner thoughts. For one, I’m going to take a moment and be grateful that spiders don’t fly. Also that I would love to see what it would be if we ever had an “anti thunderstorm.” Consider how freaky it would be if we started with loud, high-pitched screeches followed by flashes of extreme darkness (during the day). Much more end-of-the-world than some of the stuff people stress about these days.
Hmmm… probably time for another pill.