The Wisdom of Cows

Normally cows and pie bring to mind certain things. Today I’m going to tell you a philosophy joke about cows and pi. Believe it or not, it has given me a lot to think about in terms of aggravation and how to be a happier person.

Two cows were standing in a field munching on grass. The first cow says, “You know, although we have typically worked out pi to five digits; 3.14159, it bothers me that it’s really an infinite number and we will never figure it out.” The second cow pauses a moment, looks up, and says, “Moo.”

I am lately envious of the second cow because there are ever-more days I would love to just munch grass and enjoy pastoral loveliness. Instead, I am too often swept up in the drama of political intrigue, family issues, or the malevolence of social media.

It would be nice once in a while to tune out so I can go about the business of nurturing my family, doing my job, and paying bills without worrying about things over which I have no control.  I want the be the Taylor Swift of cows and just ‘shake it off!

I can’t do anything about the negative feelings people may have about our President all the way down to, hmmm, my kid’s little league coach. But just walking around in the world every day, I have to hear it. I honestly don’t wish to be a person who is not engaged in life and society, but I have fewer and fewer moments after I wake up before I’m in a bad mood. 

Lately I have also stayed off social media because my friends have been vilified for decisions or indecision, and, while I may not know all the details, they are still humans with families and lives, and they are doing their best to do the right thing. Even as a writer, I may get twenty nice comments, but all I can think about is the one nasty one. God bless the people who still produce great things because they aren’t bothered by Troll feedback.

Cow #1 cannot do anything about the Professionally Angry,  who live to press the “outrage” button on their keyboard. Cow #2 is blissfully unaware of the vitriol; and while #1 may think #2 is ill-informed, which one is really happier?

To you, cow #1… honestly, you’re going to be fine. I know it is perhaps the mission of television and the Internet to tell you everything is terrible and we are in the new fall of the Roman Empire. I also know they tell you scary things to be mean and crush your self-esteem——some believe it is the best way to get you to do things the way they think you should. 

Remember things have always been this way. Every generation has had a certain segment of people who believed they were in the best or the worst of all times. Someone has to be in charge and someone else has to be against that person, with new ideas. Someone has to run our County and pay our bills so we can continue to live in a safe place with good schools and fun things to do. Anyway, my primary message is this: don’t spend all your time in worry.

Do a little thing that makes sense to you to save the planet. Accept that the rate of change in your life will always be constant. For every depressing news story you hear from an overly hair-sprayed head, there are three people out there working really hard trying to change the world for the better. Many of these people are succeeding, but you might not hear that because it would make you feel positive, and that’s not going to turn the world the way some people want it.

Kids are still doing school plays, playing baseball, and doing odd jobs to save up to buy their own toys. Kitchens are still feeding hungry people, and people are ringing bells for someone’s last day of chemo. So, don’t build a nuclear bunker and stockpile baked beans just yet. Be the cow who trusts the things that have gotten you this far, and do your best to maintain and pass them on.

In other words, from now on, when I find myself feeling anciently tired from people who have nothing nice to say, I’m going with cow #2. For anyone ready to blast an angry email because all they got out of this satire is Poppy clearly thinks people are cows, bless your heart… Moo.